The clock strikes 90 degrees, but it is still hot yet windy. I'm standing at the crow's nest overlooking the seashore when something hits me; not a rock but a thought.
Everyone is a pirate of their life, sailing across the sea looking for treasure chests. But it's not easy to be one! Kids are scared of them and are called ‘bad guys’ by the grown-ups because they steal. However, have these people ever thought about why they continue to do what they are doing? No, because everyone only looks at the surface of everything.
Right now, I am holding this newly found chest, staring at it while the cool breeze hugs me and the small waves that should be music to my ears deafen me as if it is telling me to hurry up because the sun is a clock and it can't wait to be unlocked. The sun is setting, but I am still sweating. As I put the key in the keyhole, my hands began shaking, and my lips started trembling. The feelings are odd, and I can't shake them off: what am I so afraid of? Perhaps it was because of gold or the idea of the goof.
I was confused when I opened it because a bunch of rolled papers surprised me, not a mountain of coins. Right there, along with the thought of wealth collapsing, is when the anger and disappointment consume me. But what annoys me? Is it because of the money that turned into stone or because I don't like this story's tone?
I saw myself unconsciously opening the rolls in the hope that maybe they're land titles and heritages I can take advantage of, but as I read them, none of these filled up my expectations.
The rolled papers have different questions and phrases left unanswered and undisturbed.
“What if I pursue my dreams?”
“If she only won.”
“History repeats itself.”
“Will I ever be better at something, or I'll stay mediocre forever?”
“Am I gonna pass?”
“I want to die.”
“I'm a big failure!
What struck me the most out of all the phrases is the last one: “Life is not real.”
I was perplexed by the idea because it sounds so impossible, but at that moment, I couldn’t help but wonder: what if this quote happened to be true?
And that's when I realize this is not a chest of gold but a chest of what-ifs and notions. I suddenly thought of mine. Wait, what's mine? Should I also have one? When I am following no one, like a ship that left no vestiges. More likely paving my own way groping, done by cut-and-try.
Paint tint of orange, low tide, and big ship. Now the clock strikes 180, I walk to the main deck, look up, and close my eyes, savoring the cold wind while the migrator is sailing. Upon standing there, I came up with a conclusion: everyone is a pirate in their life, but it is more likely that they are sailing not to find treasures but for truth instead and themselves, perhaps. They do not steal because they just want to, but because they do not know what to do. And if you think they're scary, it is because they are scared too.
I opened my eyes and said, “Life drives people crazy.” Absolutely. It puts and makes you do things you never wanted. Push you to the edges until you fall and crawl. It's a game of survival, and you'll wish multiple times that the odds will be in your favor. The sad reality is that living is stealing; the money only makes it sound better. You have to do something to keep breathing, even if it means stopping others'.
This is a loop, an unending search for yourself and truth, but truth be told: you will never find it unless you stop seeking growth. Because when you crave development, you won't take the same route at the same pace. You will not get the truth that you want, because it has to be what you need.
Comments